Two Words You Need to Stop Saying
by Cindi McMenamin
I’ll admit it. I’ve said the words aloud or thought them many times.
And I’m guessing you have, too.
They’re two of the most debilitating words a mom can say, especially in regards to her children. These two words fill our minds with doubt and our hearts with fear.
They are the dreaded words…
What if my children don’t make friends?
What if my son follows the wrong crowd?
What if my daughter is lying to me?
What if my kids never get a good job?
What if they never get married?
And finally: What if I’m blowing it as a mom?
But I realized one day, after spending time in God’s Word, that at the root of all my “What if” questions is what I really believe about God’s character. When my mind plays through the various what ifs, the question I’m really asking is “What if God isn’t capable?” and “What if God isn’t good?”
There’s a reason God’s Word tells: “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus,” (Philippians 4:6-7, NLT).
As I give God all of my what ifs, worries, and anxieties, He can calm my heart and remind me that He is in absolute control.
That was the lesson I had to learn myself before I wrote my book, 10 Secrets to Becoming a Worry-Free Mom. Based on my own experience mothering – as well as wisdom and advice from many other moms – I found that there are treasures (secrets, if you will) to discover as we surrender to God what is closest to our hearts – our children.
One of those treasures is the incredible peace He offers as the Perfect Parent who allows us to partner with Him in raising, loving, and caring (not worrying) for our kids.
When I give God what is closest to my heart I am saying “You, God, are capable. You are trustworthy. And all my worries and what ifs are in vain.”
What are you saying – to God and to others – when you worry? And what would you like to start saying with your life and your actions from this point on?
Can you start practicing some new words each time those two old words “what if” come to your mind? Here are a few to start with:
- Start whispering “They’re Yours” whenever a worry comes to your mind as a way of affirming to God that you are placing your children in His capable hands.
- Say aloud “I trust You” as a reminder to yourself – and to God – that He is in control and He loves your children even more than you do.
- Instead of the words “Be careful” (which simply reinforce your worried thoughts) tell your children “Be in His care” which is a reminder to you and to them that they are His.
What new words can you start saying this year to kick the worry habit?
Cindi McMenamin is a national women’s conference speaker and author of several books, including When Women Walk Alone, (more than 125,000 copies sold), When a Woman Inspires Her Husband, When a Mom Inspires Her Daughter, and her most recent, 10 Secrets to Becoming a Worry-Free Mom. For more on Cindi’s books and speaking ministry, see her website: www.StrengthForTheSoul.com.